Pins & Needles - Nov. 3, 2007

First, thanks for the messages today. I have been sitting on pins and needles waiting on the doctor to call. It has been very difficult to concentrate and teach school. I am so thankful my mother-n-law is the glue keeping the school day flowing. She taught school for 33 years and just told me she couldn't believe what we do in one day...it is enough for a week! That makes me feel awesome. I was afraid I was actually behind since the kids missed a week of school!!

The doctor just called. He said that the abnormalities in my bone marrow is not something that they routinely see at Madigan Army Hospital, and it didn't fit into any good box for a diagnosis either. That is why he sent it onto Chicago/Northwestern University. At Northwestern, they said that while my bone marrow isn't normal, they have seen this before and that it does fit into a diagnosis. It is not cancer. Thank you Jesus!!! It is actually a response from my bone marrow overproducing in an attempt to keep my body alive. They think that if I can eliminate the aspergillus in my body via the fungal chemo (last day Jan. 22nd but who's counting?) and can avoid anaphylaxis triggers, my bone marrow should simmer down. They are going to repeat the bone marrow biopsy again in March. Whew! What a relief.

Now that the biopsy results are done, I want to reach for a goal that would feel so good...I want to be strong enough to drive again. It is so frustrating to be so weak and shakey that I can't drive. It feels like forever since I've had any independence...or even had the stamina to seek the independence. I'm out of a wheel chair and that's progress. I'm walking around the house without falling over and that's progress. I sooooo want to feel good enough to just go to the store for something if I needed it...to be able to get behind a wheel and drive. So, now that is my prayer request for today. Little things like driving or even walking out to check the mailbox take on a whole new meaning when you can't do any of them.

Mike is home in WA. He left Indiana on Saturday. We will miss him terribly. The boys and I are staying put in Mitchell this week because I am so weak. We may go up to Indy over the weekend, but we have not made definite plans yet. I do have a ride from Dawn lined up because I'm ....let me think here....oh yeah....too weak to drive....but God does answer prayer (see above paragraph ). So, I'm asking for prayer for strength and independence.

The boys are doing great. They are loving seeing everyone and going to the ball games. I am so blessed to have so much help, because I really am unable to do it by myself at this point in time. Thank you.